Self-Mastery and Dominion Over Myself

Lessons Learned this Week:

In a talk given in April 1975 entitled “Success is Gauged by Self-Mastery”, N. Eldon Tanner taught that a straight line is the shortest distance between two points.  He was speaking of the path we take to accomplish our goals.  We set goals and if we want to really achieve them, it is a straight shot, that of self-discipline and mastery, that will get us to our goal the quickest and without dangerous detours.  He said, “it is so evident that those who keep on the straight and narrow path leading to their goal, realizing that the straight line is the shortest distance between two points and that detours are very dangerous, are those who succeed in life and enjoy self-realization and achievement. This requires self-control and self-discipline.

“On the other hand, those who fail to keep their goals in mind and fail to discipline themselves find that they are following detours and paths that lead to failure and destruction.

“There are those who complain that to follow the straight and narrow path requires limitations, restrictions, overcoming, and doing without things that are very tempting. We must remember, however, that it guarantees victory and achievement of our goal, which is gained by setting a goal and being able to concentrate and follow an undeviating course.”

He went on to discuss how the narrow way is not the negative, confining, restrictive path we think it is.  “Narrow is a very meaningful word. Often people accuse us of being narrow-minded if we are following the straight and narrow path, which certainly does require self-restraint and self-denial. We must realize and be prepared to accept the fact that it confines us, restricts us, and limits us in certain areas. But let us fully realize that it does not fetter or shackle mankind. On the contrary, it is the way to emancipation, independence, and liberty.”  While it may seem to be confining and restricting, it will, in fact, be the very thing that gives us the ultimate independence and liberty we long for. 

Quoting philosophers, Elder Tanner noted:

“Plato said: ‘The first and best victory is to conquer self; to be conquered by self is, of all things, the most shameful and vile.’

“And da Vinci once said: ‘You will never have a greater or lesser dominion than that over yourself.’ Then he goes on to say that ‘the height of a man’s success is gauged by his self-mastery; the depth of his failure by his self-abandonment. … And this law is the expression of eternal justice. He who cannot establish dominion over himself will have no dominion over others.’ In other words, he cannot be a worthy father or leader.”

I was moved by the warning and replaced the words to be more self-directed, “In other words, [she] cannot be a worthy [mother] or leader.”

Considering my role as mother of 5 sons, I often wonder what example I am setting for them.  If I am disciplined, they will follow suit.  If I am slothful, they will be slothful.  If I am vulgar, they will be vulgar.  And if I am righteous, putting God first in my life, showing a true love of those things that are most important (scriptures, prayer, service, temple attendance, church attendance, etc…) then they are likely to follow suit.  So long as I live a disciplined life and find dominion over myself, I will have the ability to not only affect the lives of my boys for good, but I will also be more effective in my work, as others come to depend upon and trust my character.